At long last, we have reached the thrilling conclusion of my 10-year-old self’s magnum opus. I’d like to thank the academy, Clippy from Microsoft Word, and Powerpoint.
Chapter 10
The next two weeks passed by surprisingly fast. We went back to school still blue but no one would notice.
Absolutely no one. It’s fine.
We came back on the second Friday of January, which was very lucky, because we wouldn’t miss the R.A.C. The R.A.C stands for Riverside Activity Center. There’s music in the cafeteria and basketball in the gym.
That’s right. The book’s finale is a middle school dance.
When we walked into the classroom that morning everyone was staring.
“Hi.” I said kind of surprised.
“What! You lived? How can that be possible?” Karen asked obviously mad.
“Karen it sounds like you wanted them to die.” Mrs. Layford said.
Mrs. Layford is back to tell it like it is.
“Of course I wanted them to die! Why would I put them outside at midnight in the freezing cold if I didn’t want them to die!” Karen shouted. Everyone was silent.
“You little flake of a turd!” Kathy shouted.
Listen, this was the peak insult in my group of friends in elementary school. Karen just got eviscerated.
“Karen you are suspended! Now go to the office and call your mom!” Mrs. Layford exclaimed. Karen walked out of the room miserable.
“You know I almost feel sorry for her.” I said.
“Yeah. Almost!” Laurie shouted and everyone was laughing for the rest of the class.
**camera clicks as Smashmouth starts playing and we get to the epilogue of this Teen Nick special**
Later that night at the R.A.C we were having a good time dancing to the music and then came the slow dancing songs.
THE SLOW DANCING SONGS.
Laurie met a guy named Alex and danced with him. Julia danced with a boy named John. Kathy danced with some guy that I don’t know and Jenna and I danced with Ryan and Tyler.
Everyone gets boyfriends because that’s just what happens, right???
That night was when Jenna and I began to kind of like Ryan and Tyler.
Compulsory heterosexuality! **vomits**
Every R.A.C we would always dance with the same people and the rest of the year brought laughs and good memories. Then there were the summer months ahead, which meant we would have to separate. But we were all in for a surprise that summer.
OH NO IS THIS A SEQUEL SET-UP? Yes, yes it is. And there is a sequel. I channeled my undying love for The Parent Trap and set it at a summer camp based on the actual summer camp I went to.
Well, this has been the long-awaited conclusion to my loving mockery of the first book I ever finished. It’s so, so cringey and I can only hope I’ve vastly improved over the years.